Pondering

just a few thoughts i had today:

*a phrase my friend used that really made me chuckle - "seems like she's going turbo slut".

"turbo slut." haha, it's right up there with a personal fave, "sorostitute." (sorority-prostitute)

*i'm convinced that my legacy at WMA will be, the "through that door" girl. already, four times today, i've scene random "talent" wandering and muttering to themselves. right around the time they're thinking about panicking, i finally ask, "may i help you?" "uuuuh, ooooh, yeah, how do i get outta here?" or "how do i get to the lobby?" or "where's the bathroom." i then politely point and say, it's right out the BIG, BROWN DOOR YOU'RE STANDING IN FRONT OF.

to which they sometimes chuckle, say thanks or just say nothing and walk out like the cocks that they are. the best though, is when a few seriously say, "wow, i never woulda guessed that." or "hmm, how was i to know that?" i then relay, "that's okay..." all the while, pointing up to the NEON GREEN EXIT SIGN hanging right above them. sometimes they get it, sometimes they don't.

you see, they come in through a different door (five feet away) and eventually get turned around in the simplistic maze that is our office. somehow a SQUARE has become too much to remember. don't worry, they often drop bread crumbs on their way in and out...they just don't do it intentionally. which leads to my next point.

*Actors are pigs. am i surrounded by all the insecure thespians who were kicked out of their houses in highschool, hence they never learned to clean up after themselves? the males AND females here spill coffee, tea, bread, piss, you name it, all over the place like a public fucking kitchen/restroom. i'm disgusted atleast twice a day. the bathrooms are atrocious. i've never known so many females piss all over the seat. i mean, wtf ladies? where are they squatting? there's no need...USE THE TOILET SEAT COVERS. and normally you KNOW when you've missed the bowl...it's YOUR OWN PISS, SO CLEAN IT UP.

woah, my blood pressure is rising...but let me just say that i've come up with some pretty clever comments in my head and the next time it happens, i'm so ready to enter the lobby full of lazy, dirty "talent" and provide them with a powerpoint presentation of their mess and proper social etiquette. *SNAP*

the poor facilities people are constantly wiping things down and picking things up. they're the ones that have the real stories. i'm gonna have to go break up their "almuerza" one day and get some good content in my finest spanglish.

*my coworker's wife makes crack cookies. i don't know what's in them, but they are amazing. you know how sometimes you'll have a cookie and think, "eh it was okay, but not really worth eating." not these. they look like basic chocolate chip cookies, but the second it hits your lips, your eyes glaze over and you can think of nothing more than....how can i get another one?!?

he knows they are my weakness, so he teases me with them. he's my dealer and i'm the sugar-fiend standing in the shadows waiting to pounce on the tupperware container that holds my fix. i must look like a tree shredder when i eat them... mulch crumbs flying everywhere as i devour my crack pie. i wish you all could try them....alas, there is no recipe. this mythical woman just "throws them together." sans recipe. i hate being a junkie.

*more later....it's time for lunch.

Posted by missy at January 21, 2005 12:15 PM