Talblog

Things I found While Cleaning

I have been cleaning my apartment lately, trying to go through everything and get rid of all the excess crap in my life. I found this picture of my best friend that I have known since I was two years old named Mark Mcdonald.

We still know each other, but I haven't seen him in about 8 years or something. He still lives in Toronto. Regardless... this photo was taken at the mall right before we hit up the arcade. The mall was called Lime Ridge, a parking lot we would skate frequently in later years.

This photo brings back a lot of memories. For instance, the reason it is so smeared is that we got into a fight a couple of years later and he threw the picture in the toilet. I grabbed it out of the toilet water and saved it, because I am sensitive like that, and new it was important. I kept it ever since, and I don't think I have any other picture of this friend of mine that is my oldest.

Cool.

love your job

http://www.fecalface.com/news2/archives/love_your_job.html

My Eyes

I got my eyes scanned this weekend. They use it to look for festering disease now, and glaucoma. It is supposed to be better because they don't have dilate you, and they can compare images from one year to the next. Pretty sweet, PLUS they email you the images. Apparently my eyes are pretty much the best.

just shoot me in the face already.

right so, if anyone manages to ever read the encyclopedia that is my last blog (brett), just add this as the cherry on top of the shit sunday. so my elbow still hurts, but who cares, right? i'll just have to scale back my extreme workouts and one-armed pushups.

long story short, i went to a bbq in the hollywood hills before i left town back in june. met an interesting crowd of people including this one guy who works for the creator/writer of "Scrubs". he seemed like a nice guy, but i didn't pay too much attention, just creative banter etc. then while i was in illinois, he emailed me and asked to meet up for drinks when i got back in town.

i never gave him my email which means he had to go through atleast two people to get it. he claimed it was for platonic reasons only, which is totally fine with me...although i find it slightly odd that a guy would go to some lengths for a laugh, but what do i know? he was funny and it would be fun. so i said yes.

after all the weddings etc, i emailed to say i was back in town. a week passed of back n forth emails before we settled on a time and place. decision: thursday night at a hotel bar in beverly hills, 8PM (aka tonight). sweet, see you there. (after yesterdays debacle and chugging repeated doses of advil i was kinda sluggish today, but pulled myself together to hit the gym and get decently dolled up for an evening of friendly banter). he was gonna work straight through, then head directly to the bar.

i was actually on time. i strive to always be on time, but it's a 50/50 chance. showed up exactly at 7:59 PM. so very "un" hollywood of me, but this wasn't some chic party or a club, so ontime is a good thing. right?

8:02 PM - walk around lobby area, peer in bar and gaze through glass windows to pool-lounge area, but don't see funny guy.
8:05 PM - ah crap, do i remember what he really looks like? shit. should have paid more attention.
8:10 PM - take a seat in the chic lobby area. poor guy,he was probably held up at work.
8:18 PM - this is kinda ridiculous. i should have emailed him my phone number prior to 6 PM tonight...but he never gave me his either.
8:20 PM - fuck this, calling lara. can't pretend to be interested any longer.
8:30 PM - lara had to order her dinner and hung up. calling bess.
8:38 PM - woah, have i been waiting that long? lara calls back, i opt to head to the bar, i need a drink. where the hell is this guy? call bess again.
8:43 PM - made friends with the bartender, now sipping on a delicious glass of pinot noir. aaaaah. still no sight of douchebag.
8:45 PM - start talking to other people around me. meet a slightly euro, slightly handsome guy and chat it up. include other solo female at the bar in our convo.
8:55 PM - have totally given up on cocksucker, but enjoying my new friends. try "mark's" uber topshelf martini. still tastes like gasoline to me.
9:00 PM - lara called back, she's on her way to meet me. order another drink.
9:05 PM - "mark" turns out to be a beverly hills plastic surgeon. i was joking when i guessed that, he was serious. his fellow surgeon friend arrives, they are seated for dinner.
9:15 PM - have successfully fended off two "lurkers" aka total tools. lara arrives, evening saved.
10:45 PM - depart, sufficiently liquored up, laughing at the irony of the entire evening/week/month. holy crap that wine was strong.

so there you have it. i was totally set up and stood up...and in an absurd twist, i actually don't care. the evening turned out well anyway and i had zero expectations for the guy, so no loss. i guess i should be slightly irritated, i've never been formally stood up before....so noted; 25 years, 10 months, 21 days. eh, there are far worse things in life.

wonder if i'll get an excuse or explanation tomorrow. can't wait!

TODAY..... so he must have checked his email this morning and saw my email from yesterday afternoon:

hey... here's my cell just in case. of course it's only good til tomorrow when i finally switch over to my 310 #....about damn time. 703-***-2832. 8 at Avalon...check. see ya soon.

-missy

i get this at 8:40 this morning, ....

subj: I'M AN IDIOT

Hey Missy,

I am just realizing now - this morning - that we were supposed to meet last night - when I had it in my calendar for NEXT wed. - I am so sorry - feel free to never talk to me again and to tell Grace that I am a flakey a-hole - (that sounds gross) - anyway - I am really sorry and I promise if I can get my shit together that all the drinks will be on me - hope you aren't completely pissed off at me -

douchebag (of course he wrote his name here)

[please note that next wednesday would ALSO be incorrect as he had to postpone it to a thursday due to work]

Best Mug shot ever

Poor Huffers.

You can find more here

i mean seriously...

i must say, life just seems to be improving exponentially.

i finally thought i was getting my head above water....or atleast really putting in the effort to rise from rock bottom, when well, yesterday happened.

after my very productive tuesday, which included checking my car (nicknamed "kit") into the spa for a sweet 40K mile tuneup - *honk honk* - i was ready to get my ass in gear on wednesday. i still had a laundry list of errands to run, so i slept in. damnit. got up at 11 AM, checked the usual job listings, called my headhunters for updates and cleaned a bit.

background: my friend bess just moved to LA and is staying with me and rachel for a couple weeks. we're three peas in a little pod, literally. bess's pre-planned roommate's new job got pushed back three months... no worries, but she works in sales aka from home aka we hang out all day....she's homeless and i'm jobless, we're quite a pair.

back to wed: halfway through the day, my friend emilie (an eastcoast friend who recently moved to anaheim with her law-school bf) calls offering her two extra free season tix for the Angels game that night. saweeet bball, sign us up. around 4 o'clock bess and i hop in my sweet civic and drive an hour to anaheim. halfway there i get a random craving for coffee. mind you, i drink coffee maybe twice a month... odd, but bess is in for a frapaccino as well, so we keep our eyes peeled for a coffee bean or starbucks. apparently anaheim rejects high-end coffee, 'cause we didn't see either....anywhere.

i call emilie as we near her apartment and she suggests a gas station nearby for our java fix. uuuuuh what? psssshaw, gas station coffee? surely you jest, emilie. i would like to spend $4 on a small vanilla latte thank you very much. so we decide to take matters into our own hands and drive around the the three square miles of anaheim that i know.

we were about to give up as we neared an intersection with blinking red traffic lights (two blocks from emilie's). while we waited for our turn to pause and accelerate, we chit-chatted aimlessly, most likely about how appalling it was that there was no overpriced coffee in sight. when BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we lurched, bess screamed and i hit the brakes. holy shit, kit just got rammed up the tailpipe! i looked in my rearview and saw some dude on his cell phone waving me to pull around the corner. DICK.

bess and i stared at each other in disbelief, but were not bleeding anywhere. somehow my entire center console was soaked and my sunroof cover had been jarred open about 6 inches. what the hell. the impact caused our water bottles to EXPLODE out of the holders, drenching the interior...i feared for kit's bumper. slowly i emerged from my car, suddenly dizzy, to lay my eyes apon the ultimate piece of crap that had the audacity to ruin our happy evening.

a 1995 white mercury sable. a white car. i hate white cars. ironic.

immediately i went into "i will not get fucked on this" mode. every accident horror story from friends and family's past came flooding to the forefront. the guy got off his phone and emerged frantic, "OMG ARE YOU OKAY, OH NO, SERIOUSLY, HOW ARE YOU etc etc." i walked to the bumper, saw that his car didn't have any apparent damage, but my sweet blue pearl appeared to be a victim of target practice....how the hell are there HOLES and RIVETS in the bumper?!? i suddenly realized this could be so much worse.

#1. he had insurance.
#2. he spoke english.

based on these two facts, i thought everything would be okay. he ended up being a super nice guy and we saw no reason to get upset or angry, but remained skeptical. i exquisitely extracted my little black quote book, pen, camera, insurance card, ID and documented all damage, intersection and even slyly took a video of his face and voice. i retrieved every ounce of information and evidence from him, short of a hair sample. yes thank you, i should work for the FBI. could you please pass me my insurance card sir? be sure to get a full thumb print on that...perfect.

this was his first at-fault accident in 25 years and it turns out he even works for insurance and was horrified that he just fell victim to "accident while on a cell phone" category...damn straight. after a ten minute exchange i realized my head was pounding and neck was really tight. kinda like after you ride four or five hardcore rollercoasters in a row. i could see bess in the car rubbing her neck and thought, "ah shit. it's fine if i'm woozy, but i hate to have my passengers all jacked up."

the idea of coffee was quite insignificant after that, so i pounded some advil and off we went to the game. where gem #2 occurred:

second inning, i decide to take a few photos. my head is feeling better, perhaps it's the beer mixing with the pills. i stood up to get a photo of emilie and john, when unbeknownst to me, my lil green seat flips back up. well i twirl around to sit back down and instead eat complete shit on the stadium floor. damnit!!! well actually i didn't quite hit the ground...my knobby elbow saved me. yes, my entire bodyweight held two inches above the ground by a half inch of bone. suddenly, my head and elbow were fighting for dibs on what hurt worst. i let everyone enjoy their hearty laughs and insisted they refrain from stifling any amusement. IDIOT.

did i mention the Angels friggin lost?!? as the night progressed, bess and i looked more and more like zombies, moving only with extreme caution. we split a bottle of advil and called it a night. i barely slept and my elbow fucking hurts. his insurance called this morning accepting full liability and is ready to cover damages and a rental, so that's a huge relief. now if i could only straighten my damn cock-eyed right arm. i'm just waiting to finish off the trio of pain by walking into a door (or something equally stupid).

it'll take a week or so, but i'm totally gun shy around other cars, which is the worst. i kinda want to wrap my car in rubber diapers and wear a helmut. oooh i need to go ice my elbow.

definition of a friend:

me: damn, he hit us hard... good thing the airbags didn't deploy, that shit would break my nose.
bess: he hit us really hard.
me: actually, maybe if i had a broken nose, employers would feel sorry for me and give me a job.
bess: do you want me to punch you in the face?
me: i'll let you know.

Google Moon

Cool... moon.google.com

West Coast Trip

I figured I should make the official announcement. Kurt and I are coming out to the West Coast in October. My brother is getting married in LA in the middle of the month (the bride is from there), so we will be extending our trip and plan to make our way up to San Francisco. We're excited to see everyone and will let you know when we decide on the dates.

Now maybe one of you will venture down south one day…

Sauce, the best sauce

Make this sauce, and eat it... it only takes 30 minutes, and it is so good.

Get:

- half cup of chopped up chunky good salami
- 1 med. onion
- 3 cloves garlic
- 3/4 can chicken broth
- 1 can tomato sauce (plain canned sauce)
- salt, pepper, herbs if you care, but not necessary
- some crushed red peppers, like the kind you shake on pizza
- half cup of nice red wine

Make:

Put a good amount of olive oil in a pan. heat the pain, cut up the garlic and onion and throw it in. Cook it until the onion is transluscent. add some salt and pepper, throw in the salami. Cook that for about 2 or three minutes, and pour in the wine, the tomato sauce and the broth. add whatever herbs you care about, and the crushed red peppers. Simmer on a lowish heat until the sauce cooks down and is more saucy than liquidy. Pour over pasta or chicken and you are good to go. freaking delicioso

Spent Thursday, Friday and Saturday down in San Diego for the Comic Con. All I can say is my friends suck for not coming but they missed out on new footage from Harry Potter 4(Not enough to really pacify), The Fountain(absolutely stunning but potentially confusing multiepic film from Aronofsky), V For Vendetta(This could be amazing. The trailer was. 2nd Unit director of Matrix Directs as the Wachowski 2nd Unit. I'm two thumbs upping the whole thing), and Corpse Bride (which I think I got bored of). Went to the Master of Horrors party Friday night, sprained my ankle. Met and talked with Stan Lee. Oh, and bought some artwork....

Toys Toys Toys and crazy stuff....

sick!

Now with pictures. The Dancing Napoleon is awesome.

Napoleon
Corpse Bride

Def. getting those Corpse Bride Toys

On another note. Check out these crazy clouds. I can't believe they're real!!

Crazy Clouds site

KCRW Bowl 2

So I was invited to to the second installment of the KRCW Hollywood Bowl series -- Bossacucanova, Roysopp and Basement Jaxx. It freaking rocked. I highly recommend seeing BJ or Roysopp

Anyways the plan was to meet at this guys house in the Hollywood Hills. In fact its the house that was used in Be Cool. One of the MOST specatacular view in all of LA. Anyways it belongs to this guy, who basically is a ring leader in LA's Sugar Daddy party scene....

(Basically the older hollywood gay mafia host these parties for 20 year olds who mutually take advantage of each other.) Anyways I show up and being so neurotically shy can't say a word to anyone and when I do I just fumble. Plain and simple I suck. So the 11 of use get ourselves together and start to head down there. Someone gets the bright idea that we should walk. Its like 20 blocks straight down the hollywood hills. And we are all carrying supplies for the picnic we are planning on having before going into the bowl. Unheard of in LA. Walking. So we walk and being the out of shape cow that I am of course start to get self conscience of the fact that all of these people aren't breaking a sweat and they are all under 25 living in the prime of their lives and I'm not. I'm just thinking of the old Mutual of Omaha series in which they eldest of the pack are left behind to fend for themselves and be eaten wolves. Except there are no wolves and its quite apparent I'm not getting eaten. So maybe its not like that. Back to the story. We get to the park I break out these awesome Shish-kabobs I made and surprise surprise no one is hungry (little do I know they are all on Anthony's vallium and food quells the effects) so every pretty much goes to waste. We head in get our seats and proceed to spend the last of the daylight hours enjoying the scenery. So Bossacucanova starts and while a fine band apparently you just need a female vocalest that can go ba da do da over and over again and that makes you a band. No real vocals just ba ba bada ba ba. So they finish and 40 minutes later Roysopp starts and I was quite impressed with their first couple of tracks. Amazing electronica stuff. Towards the end it started getting a little boring an predicatable but fun none the less. Now this could have been because at this point after drinking almost an entire bottle of red wine I started to feel the rhythm of the night. Just a little bit of hipswaying, thumping and moving. Nothing crazy. And then Basement Jaxx started. It was at this point I started to dance in the isle. I sort of lost control and pulled out some crazy moves I haven't done in years. Now before you all freak and think oh no. I'm not that bad of a dancer. In fact I can move. But in this case I threw caution to the wind and just let it take me. So much freaking fun. Hadn't done that in years. And then the music stopped. I hadn't really taken a moment to think of how this group was going to take that. Yeah. Apparently they were all worried that I was going to be the wall flower of the evening and not enjoy myself. Instead I have no idea what they thought. Hopefully I'm still in the in and not outside but then I don't think I was in the in before so hopefully this hasn't blown my chance of getting in the in.

Anyways Basment Jaxx was awesome and I highly recommend seeing them. Roysopp too. If you get the chance, go.

holy crap....

...i have cable! this is amazing. right, so this may not seem like a big deal to everyone else, but for me this is huge. since i moved here i've had to forego sweet luxuries like a washing machine, dishwasher, answering machine and cable. i've programmed our tv quite a few times over a year and a half, only to be stuck with 20 crappy channels...10 of which are in other languages.

my roommate wasn't too sad since she didn't grow up with cable and i chose to spend my pittance on other utilities. i, however, grew up on mtv and cnn, none of this public tv cocknbull. it's become quite common for me to walk into the tv room and see my roomie engrossed in a japanese soap opera or glued to mind-enhancing PBS special. luckily, i've always had the wealthy, emmy-award winning* rocco to turn to. he lives just 12 minutes away and has all the channels under the sun PLUS tivo, so my sanity has been spared.

well today bess and i were trying to lounge on the couch and waste a perfectly good sunday, but all plans were foiled by the tragic programming on my shitty 20 channels. this sucks!!! sidenote: somehow our remote seems to blitz out everytime i leave town and my roomie gives up and assumes it's a lost cause. not me. so i changed the batteries, reprogrammed it and started testing out random channels. that was when the magic happened.

my face dropped and heart lept when channel after channel produced another clear picture of the innovative programming i have missed for so long. for some beautiful, amazing reason we have been granted full cable (minus the premiums of course)...but what the hell....i mean, mtv. comedy central. the superstation. vh1. and best of all...ALL THREE CABLE NEWS NETWORKS. (yes i am a news junkie sometimes...all the time). i have no idea how long we've had them, but we do....our stupid tv just didn't auto-program them.

sadly, this revelation comes after we'd already agreed to jerry-rig cable from our neighbor who's having dish network installed later this month...then split the costs. er, um...well, we don't need to anymore. doh. dish network equals DVR though, so hell, one month free is fine. i want me some DVR. i love technology.

*in an effort to boost rocco's morale, he now requires the "wealthy, emmy award winning" bit be added to his name. if i had an emmy, hell, i'd wear it around my neck.

Aweeeeeeeeeesome!!!!!

I hope to god they make this. It looks so awesome. You can customize your keyboards keys with images, specifically for games or apps or whatever. Sooooo sick! Can you imagine!!!! Enough talk...check it out.l

Article about the design

I'd buy one for sheeeeeeezy.

Calling all Burritophiles!

Eat me ;)

Fine then

Here is mine. DONT YOU CENSOR ME, I am expressing myself.

GO

Greatest Idea Ever

What a great ad.

Face full of marbles

I have a dish full of bleach and teeth sitting on my sink.

They were from the very back of my mouth because apparently I am too evolved to have them, but not evolved enough to have not grown them at all. Darwin was a dick.

Anesthaesia is awesome... 3 - 2 - 1 what happened? I am already done? Where am I? Who are you and why are you handing me a bag full of teeth? That part was great. I had a mouth full of gausse and blood, which was disgusting. Becky came with me as my designated ride home. She was smart and decided to take a dental appointment at the same time as mine, so she wouldn't have to drive all the way up to marin next week and do it over again. Her dentist wasn't so smart though, and she had to go back once I was all done to finish up her "crown" work.

I sat in her waiting room, tripping and bleeding all over myself. I must have looked pretty scary. I don't really remember what happened... though there was a middle aged woman freaking about losing her keys, which I could see were right behind her on the counter. I numbly got up, grabbed them, and handed them to her. She looked at me skeptically. I didn't open my mouth for fear blood would fly out and she would scream. gross but totally awesome. Kind of like fight club when edward norton smiled at his co-worker. At least that is how I pictured it.

I got home and cleaned myself up. Becky had to rush out for work... I laid around and waited for lucidity. I got so hungry but could only spoon myself apple sauce. For those who know me, you know how torturous this was. Fuck I want a burrito. Vicadin made me nauseous so I just took advil.

Yesterday was rad. My face was chipmunkian. My tongue became aware of my stitches as I played oddworld:strangers wrath. Good game by the way. There was shit on t.v. Becky made her homemade chicken soup. Ah bliss.

Now I am pretty sick of the chipmunk thing. I think I am going to do something today, I wonder when the swelling will stop. Surprisingly, pain was not really a big part of this process. I has just been fucking annoying that I can't eat and that I can't open my jaw. Man, I would hate to see what I looked like when they were working on me. They must have pryed my jaw open to twice its natural size.

No-click website

I can't tell if this is a good or bad thing...makes me afraid to move my mouse, but it's a cool idea for peeps with carpal tunnel...i guess. Yamaha Design Site

Flight of the Penguins

Who's coming with me. I wanna see this movie soooooooooon. Like tonight or somethin.....

Article about how cool it is

Movie Trailer

Lets go

Hot Snakes, Long staple of the talbot compilation, are no more.

www.swamirecords.com

Bummer deal, my favorite rock your socks off band just called it quits, though they will be finishing their tour off (a few shows in San D, LA, NY, and europe.) If you never saw them, and are in the area, go see... because if you find out 4 years from now how damned awesome they were, you will be PISSED.

I remember seeing their second show on their first tour with mr. mark lipsmeyer about 4 years ago. That was some killer shit! Where was that again mark? They had some crazy metal afro band open that made everyone cover there ears, and a naked streaking dancer in the audience.

Songs of note, in case you wanna download em on itunes:

-automatic midnight
-suicide invoide
-XOX
-I hate the kids
-kreative kontrol
-this mystic decade

Damn

Where do you think this went?

See brett's post below for details. Click picture for a few more...

How many ways can you tell Jeremie you love him

Tonight I showed Jeremie how much I loved him by spraying him with a shower of oreo milk shake. Imagine this.....your qusai drunk friend sitting across from you at a local diner, another friend asks the guy across from you a legit question and that guy just sprays a 7 ft. spray of milkshake across the table dousing you in oreo milkshake. Why did this happen, it wasn't really a funny question. Well somethings can never be explained, but that guy across the table from me tonight was the one and only Jeremie Talbot. Soon after my heart stopped beating at 180 bpm and I stopped laughing uncontrolably I was able to breathe and I tried my best to apologize to the man across from me who was cleaning himself and his glasses from the oreo shower he just recieved. What happens next, what do you do, i mean really. You try and grab some air because for some reason you can't breathe, and you try to apologize to your good friend sitting across from you who's covered in oreo milkshake that just sprayed outta your mouth, eyes, nose and ears, directly into his face and jacket, etc. I honestly didn't mean to do it, it just came out. Kinda like that open mouth, insert foot kinda expression. We all wondered what it musta looked like from another booths perspective but it's unfathomable. Part of me thinks Jeremie was pretty pissed about it, rightfully so and I wouldn't be upset because it sucked ass, and the other part thinks he understood it wasn't intentional and forgave me, or at least will once I do something to redeem myself. However, what a fucking mess. We had a good time tonight, had delicious fries, drank plenty of beer at a german resturant, then had some desert which didn't end up the way Id've liked it to, but was still good none the less. So I need to sleep but i guess this is my public, I'm sorry for spitting Oreo milkshake all over you tonight Jeremie plee before I go to bed. You know i love you.

oh and i apologize if this makes no sense, it's late and i've had a few...(contrary to what others think...not tooooo many, but enough............enough)